Tuesday, November 27, 2001

If these notes are unenthusiastic, it's because I'm surprisingly tired. I've been dreaming too much lately. When I dream too much, I feel like I haven't slept at all. I'm sure it doesn't help that all the dreams for the past three days have involved Hannibal Lecter. Not nightmares, though. He could never give me nightmares. Purr.

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JERRY JERRY JERRY...

Ooo, Jerry in all black.

"Gay for a Day"

Dana has wild hair.

She wants to know why she's here.

Zeke, her bf, is now gay.

Billy, Zeke's new bf.

Dana: He's never been eying guys around me!

Dana: I guess I must've been in the closet too long... Billy: Then you should get yourself a woman, honey.

VO promo guy: It's one messed up show!
((Hehehehe...))

[---story change---]

Shane is here to find out a secret from his ex-gf.

Erin, the ex.

She's sleeping with Shane's current gf:>

Paula, the current gf.

Aww... Shane is crying.

He has kids with both of them. What a weird family--the kids all have the same father, so they're half siblings, and their mothers are together, so they're also sort of... step siblings...

Shane: [to Erin] YYyyou! You! I just cannot believe *you!* You got some.serious.mental.problems!

[---story change---]

Lacey says there's something fishy about her bf.

SpringerCam, Lacey's bf says she turned him gay.

Jerry: So when the sex stopped, did you think maybe he was gay? Lacey: No! Jerry: You thought it was another woman. Lacey: Well yeah! Audience: [giggles; someone says "Duh!"] Jerry: [looks round for the person] Duuuuh.

Jerry: Lacey ... seems unwilling to accept the fact that he's gay-- Lacey: He's not. He's not. It's a phase. Jerry: Well, you saw the tape. That looked pretty gay to me.

Joe, the new bf.

Joe has a bf. "It was only for the money, though."

Joe's bf says it's just a phase, too:p

Lacey's bf just offered Lacey to Joe's bf...

[---story change---]

Mo is gay.

His bf is on hormones, so he's having moodswings. So Mo slept with a real woman.

Trishawn, the transexual bf. She's gooood.

Trishawn says she would have gotten him a real woman if he'd told her. She would have "hooked it up". Audience: HOOK JERRY UP HOOK JERRY UP!

The other woman is angry. Her: I'm straight! I'm straight! What am I doin' with a gay man??
((Um, dear. He's a man. You're still straight.))

Jerry: You didn't know he's gay? Her: I'm straight! I'm straight! What am I gonna do widda gay man?? Jerry: I... I dunno... [walks away]

[---Q&A---]

Dana was encouraged, by the audience, including one of the security guys--Dave, I think--to take off her clothes. She flashed them. Richard has now turned music on so she can dance;p

All the gay guys have now risen from their seets to join the dancing;)

[---Final Thought---]

VO promo guy: We don't have any Emmy Awards. We don't get any critical acclaim. But we get aaaalll the girls!

"Till next time, take care of yourself, aaand eachother."

[---Steve walking down hall with Dana---]